Edge of the white marking against the withered asphalt..

I don’t know how it never occurred to me before, and why I’m only thinking about it now, but has anyone ever noticed the markings on a two way road with spaces. I stood right in the middle of a road, with the curve of my shoe parallel to the end of one marking. Looking down on this long lengthy path travelled daily by thousands to their destinations either happily or by force, it was completely empty. Almost eerie, somewhat nostalgic.
A reminiscent of a time when someone asked to come along on this unpredictable ride of events we call life. Ignorance, fear, rejection told me to go on without and so I went crossing each checkpoint with triumph alone, peaking back only for a fraction of a second, just cause I wanted too or maybe I needed too, I’ll never know. They say the past is done for, the future still unwritten, so focus on the present. But now when I look down at the edge of the white marking against the withered asphalt all I can think of is what I did and what I could’ve done.
In the present moment, I’m thinking about all the times I said no and going on without knowing the true distinction between solo and lonesome. I know now though, I know now. A bit too much late but I figured out.
In the present moment, I’m thinking of how one word, one gesture, one blink could’ve changed the course of not one, not two but many lives and I shiver inside. This Russian roulette of choices held me back then and holds me back now.
All of a sudden a drop falls and splutter against the blackness beneath taking form instantly, but the sky is clear and stars shine bright, so I rub my sleeve against my face take a step back now; when I should’ve many years ago and run…


Maybe yes, maybe not…not anymore..!!

I’m 8. 

I want to be a dancer, like the ones they show on television. I’ve told my best buddies about it. They think dancing is not for boys. Maybe they’re right. Maybe they’ll stop becoming friends with me if I dance. So I won’t. So I don’t, ever.

​I’m 11.

There is a new girl in my Science tuition. She wears spectacles, the round ones. She’s cute. My friends tell me to “man up” and talk to her. I can’t. They laugh.

I’m 14.

We bunked tuition for the first time. I’m afraid my mom will find out about it. My friends said they wanted to smoke. It liberates them, or so they say. I refuse to take a puff, what if Mom smells it on me? As always, they laugh. I laugh along.

I’m 16. 

My best friend takes his first bong shot. I can’t take the smell. I walk out of the room, close the door behind me. I hear their laugh. They’re my friends, they can’t be laughing at me (?)

I’m 17.

I didn’t score well in the test I’ve been preparing for so long now. It’s okay, take a sip, he says. I’m too drowned to say no. So I do, and not just one sip. They don’t laugh anymore.

I’m 18. 

I can gulp down a quarter of a Blender’s Pride alone, oh, and I know all the cheap brands. Sometimes, we puke out of disgust on the new kid who thinks we will stay away from something as amazing as alcohol. We laugh at him. He leaves the room, closes the door behind him. He reminds me a little of myself.

I’m 19.

The only two words that can light up my day are “smoke up”. I know the best places to score stuff from, the best people to trip with. I don’t prepare for tests anymore, my lines are blurred, and so is my vision. Sometimes at night, when I feel restless and can’t sleep, I feel like the parts of my body are laughing at me.

My friends made me the way i am today, but i don’t blame them for everything. I should be the one who should have changed his friends instead of trying to please them and making them think that i am also as strong, as manly, as tough as them. I drank alcohol even though i hated its taste, i smoked even though it burns my chest, i sat outside the park and commented on every girl passing by even though i really felt sad about doing so, just to show them that i am not a pussy.

Really were they my friends? Am i really  the person who i should be? Am i the person who i always wanted to be? Did the 14 year old boy who once refused to take a puff of a cigarette is still alive deep down inside me? Maybe yes, maybe not….not anymore..!!!

P.S.- This is just a post , i had never been through this all. I have wonderful friends as i choose them wisely 😉


I grow old hearing that we should never get jealous from anyone. But hey , is it 💯% right to not get jealous at all ?

No matter what everyone says , we all get jealous from someone or something at some point of time in our life. And i will try to tell you why its absolutely fine to get jealous sometimes.

I looked the exact defination of the word “jealousy” in Oxford and i got this : “an unhappy or angry feeling of wanting to have what someone else has.” 

We all are very familiar with “we don’t value something untill its gone” thing. When we get jealous that someone else is having the thing which u really want, doesn’t that mean you value that thing enough? You value that thing enough to have the desperate feeling of having it. For example, lets say you get jealous from your friend because he has an awesome bike which you really wished to have. This means you know the value of that bike. And when finally you will get it , you will appreciate it because you know what it felt when you didn’t had it. 

There’s a thing called positive jealousy. In the above example, if the thought, “Oh damn why the hell he have such an awesome bike and I don’t” come to your mind, then hey my friend its wrong. Its fine to think “oh damn what a awesome bike it is, i want one too.” 

If you get jealous over something, don’t curse the person who have it , instead try pushing your own limits and make yourself capable of having it too. 

There is same theory when it comes to humans instead of materialistic things. Well its way too important to understand the thing when it comes to human emotions. Imagine you like a girl but she is not close enough with you as much she is with her other friends. Obviously you will get jealous for not getting the attention, the love you crave for. Well its fine to get jealous over that thing , because that shows you how much that person matters to you, how you love that person, how much attention you want to get from her. You will never get that jealous if she didn’t mean to you that much.

Instead of hating her friends try to do something that may bring her to you. Everyone has their full right to have their own priority list. 

A little positive jealousy gives you the motivation to try harder. And at some point in the struggle of life, this kind of motivation is important to get you going. Take it from its bright side and it will be helpful. Take it from wrong side and you will end up losing something which you already have….


I saw so many peoples talking about our education system. So much different opinions different views different thoughts cross my mind daily. I too believe that this education system sucks. 

Why don’t school teach how to deal with emotional breakdowns instead of teaching how to burn magnesium oxide with the help of a Bunsen burner. Do you really think school is meant to teach you the dates on which Americans pursued India. Why schools just teach us the algorithms of maths which are never going to be useful in my life. 

Every person every child has different abilities. As once Einstein said , “if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree , it would spend its whole life thinking itself a fool.” Scientist already proved that no two brains are exactly same. Then why all the brains are filled with same things in school. 

This schools doesn’t improve the abilities the talents of the individuals. The exams or tests taken at school doesn’t check your capabilities your logic , it just checks your memory power. Schools should teach the children about morals , manners , honesty , truthfulness and all such kind of things. 

So many times i faced such type of situations in which i became helpless , depressed . Because i am teenager , i didn’t get a manual on how to face emotional things, on how to treat others , on love, on how to choose my career and all such type of things. And all that time , i wished so badly that someone would have showed me the way out of my problems by holding my hand and leading me to the light. 

It would be better to teach kids about how to treat others , how to help others instead of making them learn the dates on which Mughals attacked delhi. I mean come on, get over that shit. Anyone can look into books or search on internet about the dates or facts whenever they need them in life. Whats the use of teaching a kid who is in 5th standard about the Constitution of India when that kid is going to become a doctor in his future. 

Firstly schools should help children in finding the perfect profession for them. Let them decide first what they want to become and then start teaching them accordingly. I think first 4 to 5 years of school should concentrate, on teaching morals and manners to kids, on helping them choosing a career . Let them cultivate good personality traits first. Teach them to value the things they got. Teach them to be thankful to the person who gave them this life. Teach them to succeed in life by winning themselves and not by defeating others.

I don’t say basic knowledge is not important. It’s important. But what you include in that basic knowledge is much more important. 

I came across a question in my 10th standard. Question was : when the sex education is given to a man/woman ? And to my surprise , answer in the book was given that after marriage. I mean WHAT. How can you teach a person how to bat after sending him to the pitch in the semi-finals of a world cup. I believe this sex education should get included​ in the course when a human being really needs it. The children must have taught about the hormonal changes in their body about the puberty at the age of 13 or 14. Because thats the time when actually so many changes takes place in the human body and its so necessary to know about that changes.

Not only our education system is responsible for the chaos , parents are also equally responsible. I remember, Everytime when i reach home with result in hands , there was always one question waiting for me “first kon aayu class ma?” Parents never stop comparing their child with other kids. They just focus on the marksheets , the report cards. But instead of that, i say focus on what things your kid learn in school. Focus on the improvement of your kid. Marks ke piche mat bhaago, sikhne pe jor daalo. 

Its impossible to change the whole system in a fortnight. I’m just saying that we should at least try our best to teach our kid what he/she really needs to be taught at the early ages of their life. If every parent takes responsibility of teaching their kid properly then this system can get some betterment. 

Haath ma mashaal laine duniya ne na badli sako to kam se kam haath ma ek divo laine tmara ghar ne to sudharo.


Its tough to be a girl…!!!

Not saying just for the sake of saying but I mean it. Everyone is talking about feminism but I’m honestly not in support of that so called feminism. I will give a reason to that. According to so called feminism , ” Girls are equal to Boys”. But I don’t really believe it , because i think girls are far ahead than boys. I will prove this statement like my every statement.

Its actually tough to be a lady. Boys don’t have to face death called abortion before they are even born. Boys don’t have to struggle too much to maintain their image in society. Boys don’t have to worry about periods. Yes , girls go all through this and actually so much more than this , and still you can see them sitting in the garden and giving the brightest smile which can make u fall in love with them.

Have you ever noticed how much work your mom do in one day? I can’t do even 10% of that work in a day. She is the person who thinks about her family before thinking about herself. She buries her dreams just to help her family in day to day life. Do u think, leaving the home in which u had lived 20-30years of your life and move to a place which is completely new to u , is easy? And in addition to that, working your ass-off for them, working from the early morning to the late night for others.

Do u think u can behave normal behave calmly when blood is draining out from you and you can’t do anything about it except waiting for that days to pass? And it would not be for one time, it will come to you as a nightmare every month. I bet if boys have to face this, then they will not even come out of their room for days and days. 

Do u think facing the critics of the society is easy? No matter whatever u do, this society will always find a way to screw you, screw your thoughts your beliefs your whole life. No matter how much we scream everyday that our society is becoming broad minded day by day, becoming modern day by day, but we all know that the narrow mindness of our society will not be broaded so easily. People talk about u if you will walk out of your home wearing shorts and will even talk if you walk out wearing a salwar.

Slut or girl with ego, what do you want to be called? If a girl is a carefree type girl, talks frankly and friendly with everyone then she is called a slut. If a girl is a reserved type girl, a girl who keeps her thing to herself, doesn’t open up with everyone because of any reason then she is called a girl with ego. 

Do u know why girls cry over small small things? Because girls care about every small things. They overthink about everything that matters to her. No matter how much time she says it doesn’t bother her, but believe me everything affects a girl. She will think even on the smallest thing. 

“Its such a big topic to write upon. Will add more points under this topic in my further blogs”😅

Lying to Parents…#1

Quote :- Someone asked a teenager, “when did u start lying to ur parents.”

And the reply was so deep. The reply was,“when they start judging me instead of understanding me.”

Parents…. Every person has different opinions on this topic but i wanna share my views regarding to this.

Parents should not try to impose their rules their views their beliefs on their children. Should not force to study. Yup I don’t say study is not necessary but it should not be a forceful thing. Concentrate on learning instead of the marksheet. 

I will tell what parents must do if they don’t want their children to hate them. Parents should not act like a boss , they should try to become friend with their child at the right moment. I’m not saying they should act like a friend from the very beginning. Yes parenting is necessary at the early stages. Teaching, morals, personality traits is important but the most important thing over all that is the timing about that all.

I heard that when the child’s feet starts fitting in his/her parents shoes, then the parents should stop being a parent and should start behaving like a friend.

Parents always complain that their children are not giving them time , not sharing about their life with them , they are irresponsible. I just wanna tell them that just once become their friend and see how they themselve will come to you and will tell u about their problems , their heartbreaks , emotional breakdowns and everything. Its all about how comfortable they are with u. And people gets comfortable around them who understand them , advice them, not the persons who commands them , restricts them. 

Every parent wonders what their child do in his/her phone whole day. I will answer to this. Phone is the only medium through which we can stay connected to our Friends. When they can’t get anyone to whom they can share everything around them, they will take the phone and will message to his/her best friend. I advice u, be your child’s friend and then u will never complain about the over usage of the mobile phones.

Why WordPress..??

The first question comes that why only WordPress and not any other social sites..?

On other social sites , whenever i post something , people think that I’m going through that situation on which i wrote when actually I’m just expressing my thoughts my views my beliefs. People misunderstand the thing i want to say.

So this WordPress. I can express my thoughts , can share my experience without the fear of being judged or being misunderstood.

A quote that i read somewhere:- If i share something on social media doesn’t mean I’m going through that situation…its just i might liked its content.